Now, with deep, cleansing breaths maybe I can get through the
rest of this without ripping the pages from the book and
shredding them one by one... we’ll see.
Where was I...
Ron’s lost track of all the horrible things befalling
everyone’s relatives. Harry’s angry about Greyback killing the
little Montgomery brother. Hermione’s just reminded Harry that
all these horrible things come back to Voldemort and therefore
Harry must get the memory from Slug.
Right. Then the bell rings and Hermione and Ron bolt up from
their seats, looking terrified. Harry tells them both they’ll do
fine as they separate: Hermione and Ron to the entrance hall to
take the Apparition test, Harry off to potions alone.
Harry wishes them good luck. Hermione turns to him one last time
and wishes him the same, sharing a significant look before he
leaves for the dungeons.
He’s one of three who show up to Potions that day: Ernie and
Malfoy are still underage as well. Slug sets them the task of
brewing “something amusing.”
The HBP text provides a modified Euphoria elixir. Slug is
overjoyed as usual by Harry’s genius and skill at potions. But
when Harry invites Slug to taste a bit, Sluggy heads for the
hills.
Later that afternoon in the common room, Hermione bursts through
the portrait hole and excitedly calls to Harry practically before
she’s even in the room that she’s passed the exam! He’s thrilled
for her and congratulates her.
When Harry asks about Ron, she whispers that he only just failed,
leaving half an eyebrow behind. They spend the rest of the dinner
abusing the examiner which seems to make Ron feel marginally
better. (He’s like a small child mum and dad have to coddle and
distract.)
Now here comes the part where Harry actually does take the
potion. This potion is like crack...on ‘roids.
It seems to have the general actions of a typical drug...take
ibuprofen, for instance. When you take ibuprofen for a toothache,
it has no way of telling where the location of the ailment is so
it travels through your whole system. This is good if there is
more than one problem area, perhaps a toothache and a sprained
hamstring, let’s say. Both problems get fixed with one dose.
Similarly, Felix Felicis, even just the carefully measured
mouthful Harry downs (he doesn’t want to waste it, remember
he’s saving it for something really important), seems to attack
anything and everything in its path. Not only will it solve any
matters at hand for the taker, but it also bears positive results
for those around the taker.
Harry, Hermione and Ron trek up the to the boys dorm. Harry takes
his potion and immediately wants to go see Hagrid. Hermione and
Ron think this is strange and don’t understand him, they look
worried. Hermione tries to remind him that he’s supposed to see
Slug. Harry tells them to trust him because he knows what he’s
doing “or at least Felix does.” And he saunters out of the room
under the Invisibility Cloak.
Exhibit A: Felix is lucky for Ron even though Ron didn’t take it.
Lavender takes one look at Ron and Hermione coming down the
stairs “alone” and freaks. Ron sputters some sort of response,
but he didn’t want to be in a relationship with her anymore and
POOF! he’s not.
Exhibit B: On his way out, Harry bumps into Ginny as she comes in
the portrait hole. Being that Harry is invisible, she thinks Dean
was being an animal again and helping her through. She tells him
she can do it herself, and he gets annoyed with her right back. I
mean, why should he be a gentleman...no, clearly it’s better if
the boy shoves you through the door. But then again I
fundamentally do not understand Weasley logic.
So score for Harry. Or Ginny, depending. No more pesky
relationship with Dean.
Harry gets the feeling that walking by the vegetable patch would
be an excellent way to completely meander in the other direction
on his way down to Hagrid’s Hut.
He spies Slug gathering plants with Sprout. He reveals himself to
Slug and tells him about Hagrid and Aragog. Slug is excited by
the prospect of fresh arcomantula venom. Harry invites him to the
party...er, funeral. Slug says he’ll bring the wine.
Exhibit C: Slug gets his venom. A hundred galleons a pint!
Exhibit D: Hagrid gets to be consoled. Without Felix, he would
have been all alone. (Which is horrendously disgusting, but
I’ve already ranted about that enough for one chapter’s
summentary!)
Exhibit E: Harry gets his memory but only after whoring himself,
Hagrid, Slughorn and the memory of his dead mother to get what he
needs.
Hagrid is so touched that Harry made it, it breaks my heart.
Hagrid even says it’s okay that Ron and Hermione couldn’t come
down to the hut. He is so good-natured and so sweet it’s
upsetting to me that the people closest to him would abandon him
and use him to suit their own interests. It’s disgusting.
Slug’s intent was to get Hagird sloshed but winds up about
seventeen hundred sheets to the wind himself. And sometime after
the crying, the cheering, the shared stories, the unicorn hair,
and the toasting (to “Parry Otter!”), Hagrid finally passes out.
Harry takes the opportunity to talk about his dead mother’s
memory to a man who idolized her, who is drunk and vulnerable.
Maybe it shouldn’t bother me that Harry (or is it Felix?) has no
morals, I mean, the memory is very important, or at least we
thought so at the time of our first reading. Little did we know
that there laid a secret Super Wand, unbeatable and more powerful
than any other wand in the history of wands! (Convenient, that.)
Maybe it shouldn’t bother me, but I’ve never been an ends justify
the means type of person. You’ve got to respect yourself when you
get there. In the end, if you’re sick with yourself, if you can’t
look yourself in the eye, then the means and everything else
including this wonderful ending are worthless.
he just laughed...”
need to hear...I don’t want to hear...”
her...Very brave...Very funny...It was the most horrible thing...”
Page 489, U.S. Hardcover Edition
It makes me physically sick. My stomach turned reading it the
first time and it still turns now.
For some reason, I’m reminded of this claymation show they made
us watch in school when I was really little. It was called Davey
and Goliath and Davey was a little boy and Goliath was his dog
who could talk.
Well, in this one episode it was Halloween and everyone dressed
up in costumes. They all went trick-or-treating around the
neighborhood. (For anyone who isn’t American or doesn’t have that
custom, it’s just when kids go from door to door in their
costumes collecting candy.) Along the way, the three kids get
separated and each gets tempted to do something bad, something
they would never normally do.
One soaps someone’s window, one toilet papers a garden...I
don’t really remember what they did, but it was bad stuff that
kids shouldn’t do. When they got home, they felt bad about what
they had done, but they justified it to themselves as ‘oh, no,
that wasn’t me doing all those horrible things...it was my
costume.’
They fooled themselves. But they didn’t fool Goliath. He had seen
what they had done. He knew it was them the whole time. And he
explains to Davey that it doesn’t matter what pressures or
circumstances are on the outside, it doesn’t change what’s on
your inside. He may have worn a costume, but it was still him,
Davey, that damaged those people’s homes. And Davey knew better
than that.
I think in the end Davey and the other kids apologize and make
amends for what they had done, but for whatever reason that story
has always stuck with me.
Harry acts like a piece of trash here, basically torturing
Slughorn into giving him what he wants. Poor, defenseless
Slughorn who is already guilt-ridden, he probably would have only
needed a bit of prodding if Harry hadn’t botched up his first
attempt so badly.
Harry, motivated by Felix, pounces on Slug’s metaphorical jugular
and doesn’t let up until Slug taps out, defeated.
It wasn’t me. It was Felix. Felix did it!
rest of this without ripping the pages from the book and
shredding them one by one... we’ll see.
Where was I...
Ron’s lost track of all the horrible things befalling
everyone’s relatives. Harry’s angry about Greyback killing the
little Montgomery brother. Hermione’s just reminded Harry that
all these horrible things come back to Voldemort and therefore
Harry must get the memory from Slug.
Right. Then the bell rings and Hermione and Ron bolt up from
their seats, looking terrified. Harry tells them both they’ll do
fine as they separate: Hermione and Ron to the entrance hall to
take the Apparition test, Harry off to potions alone.
Harry wishes them good luck. Hermione turns to him one last time
and wishes him the same, sharing a significant look before he
leaves for the dungeons.
He’s one of three who show up to Potions that day: Ernie and
Malfoy are still underage as well. Slug sets them the task of
brewing “something amusing.”
The HBP text provides a modified Euphoria elixir. Slug is
overjoyed as usual by Harry’s genius and skill at potions. But
when Harry invites Slug to taste a bit, Sluggy heads for the
hills.
Later that afternoon in the common room, Hermione bursts through
the portrait hole and excitedly calls to Harry practically before
she’s even in the room that she’s passed the exam! He’s thrilled
for her and congratulates her.
When Harry asks about Ron, she whispers that he only just failed,
leaving half an eyebrow behind. They spend the rest of the dinner
abusing the examiner which seems to make Ron feel marginally
better. (He’s like a small child mum and dad have to coddle and
distract.)
Now here comes the part where Harry actually does take the
potion. This potion is like crack...on ‘roids.
It seems to have the general actions of a typical drug...take
ibuprofen, for instance. When you take ibuprofen for a toothache,
it has no way of telling where the location of the ailment is so
it travels through your whole system. This is good if there is
more than one problem area, perhaps a toothache and a sprained
hamstring, let’s say. Both problems get fixed with one dose.
Similarly, Felix Felicis, even just the carefully measured
mouthful Harry downs (he doesn’t want to waste it, remember
he’s saving it for something really important), seems to attack
anything and everything in its path. Not only will it solve any
matters at hand for the taker, but it also bears positive results
for those around the taker.
Harry, Hermione and Ron trek up the to the boys dorm. Harry takes
his potion and immediately wants to go see Hagrid. Hermione and
Ron think this is strange and don’t understand him, they look
worried. Hermione tries to remind him that he’s supposed to see
Slug. Harry tells them to trust him because he knows what he’s
doing “or at least Felix does.” And he saunters out of the room
under the Invisibility Cloak.
Exhibit A: Felix is lucky for Ron even though Ron didn’t take it.
Lavender takes one look at Ron and Hermione coming down the
stairs “alone” and freaks. Ron sputters some sort of response,
but he didn’t want to be in a relationship with her anymore and
POOF! he’s not.
Exhibit B: On his way out, Harry bumps into Ginny as she comes in
the portrait hole. Being that Harry is invisible, she thinks Dean
was being an animal again and helping her through. She tells him
she can do it herself, and he gets annoyed with her right back. I
mean, why should he be a gentleman...no, clearly it’s better if
the boy shoves you through the door. But then again I
fundamentally do not understand Weasley logic.
So score for Harry. Or Ginny, depending. No more pesky
relationship with Dean.
Harry gets the feeling that walking by the vegetable patch would
be an excellent way to completely meander in the other direction
on his way down to Hagrid’s Hut.
He spies Slug gathering plants with Sprout. He reveals himself to
Slug and tells him about Hagrid and Aragog. Slug is excited by
the prospect of fresh arcomantula venom. Harry invites him to the
party...er, funeral. Slug says he’ll bring the wine.
Exhibit C: Slug gets his venom. A hundred galleons a pint!
Exhibit D: Hagrid gets to be consoled. Without Felix, he would
have been all alone. (Which is horrendously disgusting, but
I’ve already ranted about that enough for one chapter’s
summentary!)
Exhibit E: Harry gets his memory but only after whoring himself,
Hagrid, Slughorn and the memory of his dead mother to get what he
needs.
Hagrid is so touched that Harry made it, it breaks my heart.
Hagrid even says it’s okay that Ron and Hermione couldn’t come
down to the hut. He is so good-natured and so sweet it’s
upsetting to me that the people closest to him would abandon him
and use him to suit their own interests. It’s disgusting.
Slug’s intent was to get Hagird sloshed but winds up about
seventeen hundred sheets to the wind himself. And sometime after
the crying, the cheering, the shared stories, the unicorn hair,
and the toasting (to “Parry Otter!”), Hagrid finally passes out.
Harry takes the opportunity to talk about his dead mother’s
memory to a man who idolized her, who is drunk and vulnerable.
Maybe it shouldn’t bother me that Harry (or is it Felix?) has no
morals, I mean, the memory is very important, or at least we
thought so at the time of our first reading. Little did we know
that there laid a secret Super Wand, unbeatable and more powerful
than any other wand in the history of wands! (Convenient, that.)
Maybe it shouldn’t bother me, but I’ve never been an ends justify
the means type of person. You’ve got to respect yourself when you
get there. In the end, if you’re sick with yourself, if you can’t
look yourself in the eye, then the means and everything else
including this wonderful ending are worthless.
- “But she didn’t move. Dad was already dead, but she
he just laughed...”
- “That’s enough!” said Slughorn suddenly, raising a shaking
need to hear...I don’t want to hear...”
- “I forgot,” lied Harry, Felix Felicis leading him on. “You
- “Liked her?” said Slughorn, his eyes brimming with tears once
her...Very brave...Very funny...It was the most horrible thing...”
- “But you won’t help her son,” said Harry. “She gave me her
Page 489, U.S. Hardcover Edition
It makes me physically sick. My stomach turned reading it the
first time and it still turns now.
For some reason, I’m reminded of this claymation show they made
us watch in school when I was really little. It was called Davey
and Goliath and Davey was a little boy and Goliath was his dog
who could talk.
Well, in this one episode it was Halloween and everyone dressed
up in costumes. They all went trick-or-treating around the
neighborhood. (For anyone who isn’t American or doesn’t have that
custom, it’s just when kids go from door to door in their
costumes collecting candy.) Along the way, the three kids get
separated and each gets tempted to do something bad, something
they would never normally do.
One soaps someone’s window, one toilet papers a garden...I
don’t really remember what they did, but it was bad stuff that
kids shouldn’t do. When they got home, they felt bad about what
they had done, but they justified it to themselves as ‘oh, no,
that wasn’t me doing all those horrible things...it was my
costume.’
They fooled themselves. But they didn’t fool Goliath. He had seen
what they had done. He knew it was them the whole time. And he
explains to Davey that it doesn’t matter what pressures or
circumstances are on the outside, it doesn’t change what’s on
your inside. He may have worn a costume, but it was still him,
Davey, that damaged those people’s homes. And Davey knew better
than that.
I think in the end Davey and the other kids apologize and make
amends for what they had done, but for whatever reason that story
has always stuck with me.
Harry acts like a piece of trash here, basically torturing
Slughorn into giving him what he wants. Poor, defenseless
Slughorn who is already guilt-ridden, he probably would have only
needed a bit of prodding if Harry hadn’t botched up his first
attempt so badly.
Harry, motivated by Felix, pounces on Slug’s metaphorical jugular
and doesn’t let up until Slug taps out, defeated.
- “You don’t want to get rid of the wizard who killed Lily
- “Harry, Harry, of course I do, but –”
“You’re scared he’ll find out you helped me?”
Slughorn said nothing; he looked terrified.
“Be brave like my mother, Professor...”
It wasn’t me. It was Felix. Felix did it!
Harry finds the Sectumsempra curse in the HBP book labeled “For
Enemies” and itches to try it, but is afraid to do so in front of
Hermione.
They distract themselves with the excitement in the air over the
first Apparition Test to be held on 21 April. There will also be
extra classes available for those who are eligible to be held in
Hogsmeade.
As Ron rushes through his DADA essay, the one Harry and Hermione
have already completed, Harry continues to flip through the
Potions book. Hermione points out that there’s nothing in there
that can help Harry with his most important assignment.
persuade Slughorn where other people can’t. It’s not a question
of slipping him a potion, anyone could do that – ”
Page 449, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Hermione having directed Harry then moves on to help Ron sort out
the mess his Spell-Checking Quill, a product of Weasley’s Wizard
Wheezes, made of his paper. So relieved by her saving him from
rewriting the entire essay, he tells her he loves her. She teases
him that he shouldn’t let Lavender hear him say that, but he
doesn’t care. He wishes she’d dump him.
Harry can’t understand why Ron won’t man up and just dump her, if
he wants out bad enough. Ron says Harry just wouldn’t understand.
Suddenly, Kreacher appears with Dobby arrives just after him.
Hermione is so surprised she shrieks a little bit. Harry never
told her of his master scheme because he was afraid of what she
might think.
She is deeply upset to hear that Dobby hasn’t slept in a week
because they were supposed to watch Malfoy 24/7. Harry cuts in
that he never meant it to be taken to that extreme, but he is
eager to hear their report.
Kreacher admires the young heir of his mistress’ bloodline, but
Dobby declares that he is a “bad boy” and is so overcome he just
about punishes himself. Harry intervenes in time and Dobby gets a
hold of himself. As far as he can tell, Malfoy is breaking no
rules, but he does go up to the seventh floor with a variety of
students.
SuperGenius Harry wakes up at this news. It dawns on Harry that
Malfoy must be using the Room of Requirement. He asks Dobby if
he’s been able to get in. Dobby tells him that’s impossible.
Harry doesn’t believe it.
on him, no problem.”
the room to become the headquarters of the D.D., so it did. But
you don’t know what the room becomes when Malfoy goes in there,
so you don’t know what to ask it to transform into.”
Page 453, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Too elated by the power of his own genius, Harry dismiss Hermione
point just stating that there will be some way they can get
around that, no matter that he has no idea what. And SuperGenius
Harry is on a roll... When Hermione questions why Malfoy would go
about his plan, whatever it is, with a bunch of random people
being involved, like lightning Harry figures it out.
Polyjuice Potion! Malfoy, under the ever watchful eye of
Slughorn, must have stolen some during that first Potions lesson
of the year. Apparently, this stuff keeps for a long period of
time...potions don’t have expiration dates, I guess. Even Romilda
Vane’s lovepotion laced chocolates still packed a punch three
months later.
Hermione leaves for bed with the warning that Harry won’t make it
into the Room of Requirement unless he knows what’s in there
first. Harry is disgruntled by her lack of support and rounds on
Ron, demanding his opinion.
The next morning, Harry is devised ways to get into the R of R
and he thinks Hermione is “rather ostentatiously showing no
interest in his whispered plans for forcing entry.” He is upset
that she isn’t trying to help him and is, in fact, ignoring him.
He tries to reassure her that he hasn’t forgotten that he has to
get the memory, but until he can think of a way to do it, he’ll
follow Malfoy.
She explains that she’s already told him how to get the memory...
he’s got to persuade Slughorn not bespell him or drug him. She
won’t give her support even after his second attempt to attain
it, and the lack of her approval is distressing for Harry.
Hermione reads that the Daily Prophet is stating that Mundungus
has been arrested for impersonating an Inferius. She scans
further to find that Octavius Pepper has vanished and a nine-year-
old boy has been arrested for trying to kill his grandparents.
Going against Hermione’s advice and Dobby’s statement that it’s
impossible, Harry makes his way up to the R of R and attempts to
get it. After at least four failed attempts, Harry arrives to
DADA late and gets points taken from Gryffindor by Snape.
Ron defends Harry to Snape, who in turn makes fun of Ron’s lack
of apparition. Harry goes to says something smart back, but
Hermione stops him for he’ll just wind up in detention again.
After the class, Lavender is there to make Ron feel better about
the jibe.
Stay tuned for the next installment where Ron pulls Harry into a
loo...Strange things are happening at Hogwarts this year!
Enemies” and itches to try it, but is afraid to do so in front of
Hermione.
They distract themselves with the excitement in the air over the
first Apparition Test to be held on 21 April. There will also be
extra classes available for those who are eligible to be held in
Hogsmeade.
- Hermione is confident, she’s achieved apparition twice!
- Harry’s not old enough yet to test, but he managed apparition
once.
- Ron is very worried; he hasn’t been able to muster it.
As Ron rushes through his DADA essay, the one Harry and Hermione
have already completed, Harry continues to flip through the
Potions book. Hermione points out that there’s nothing in there
that can help Harry with his most important assignment.
- “You’re going about it the wrong way,” said Hermione. “Only
persuade Slughorn where other people can’t. It’s not a question
of slipping him a potion, anyone could do that – ”
Page 449, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Hermione having directed Harry then moves on to help Ron sort out
the mess his Spell-Checking Quill, a product of Weasley’s Wizard
Wheezes, made of his paper. So relieved by her saving him from
rewriting the entire essay, he tells her he loves her. She teases
him that he shouldn’t let Lavender hear him say that, but he
doesn’t care. He wishes she’d dump him.
Harry can’t understand why Ron won’t man up and just dump her, if
he wants out bad enough. Ron says Harry just wouldn’t understand.
Suddenly, Kreacher appears with Dobby arrives just after him.
Hermione is so surprised she shrieks a little bit. Harry never
told her of his master scheme because he was afraid of what she
might think.
She is deeply upset to hear that Dobby hasn’t slept in a week
because they were supposed to watch Malfoy 24/7. Harry cuts in
that he never meant it to be taken to that extreme, but he is
eager to hear their report.
Kreacher admires the young heir of his mistress’ bloodline, but
Dobby declares that he is a “bad boy” and is so overcome he just
about punishes himself. Harry intervenes in time and Dobby gets a
hold of himself. As far as he can tell, Malfoy is breaking no
rules, but he does go up to the seventh floor with a variety of
students.
SuperGenius Harry wakes up at this news. It dawns on Harry that
Malfoy must be using the Room of Requirement. He asks Dobby if
he’s been able to get in. Dobby tells him that’s impossible.
Harry doesn’t believe it.
- “No, it’s not,” said Harry at once. “Malfoy got into our
on him, no problem.”
- “But I don’t think you will, Harry,” said Hermione slowly.
“Malfoy already knew exactly how we were using the room,
the room to become the headquarters of the D.D., so it did. But
you don’t know what the room becomes when Malfoy goes in there,
so you don’t know what to ask it to transform into.”
Page 453, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Too elated by the power of his own genius, Harry dismiss Hermione
point just stating that there will be some way they can get
around that, no matter that he has no idea what. And SuperGenius
Harry is on a roll... When Hermione questions why Malfoy would go
about his plan, whatever it is, with a bunch of random people
being involved, like lightning Harry figures it out.
Polyjuice Potion! Malfoy, under the ever watchful eye of
Slughorn, must have stolen some during that first Potions lesson
of the year. Apparently, this stuff keeps for a long period of
time...potions don’t have expiration dates, I guess. Even Romilda
Vane’s lovepotion laced chocolates still packed a punch three
months later.
Hermione leaves for bed with the warning that Harry won’t make it
into the Room of Requirement unless he knows what’s in there
first. Harry is disgruntled by her lack of support and rounds on
Ron, demanding his opinion.
The next morning, Harry is devised ways to get into the R of R
and he thinks Hermione is “rather ostentatiously showing no
interest in his whispered plans for forcing entry.” He is upset
that she isn’t trying to help him and is, in fact, ignoring him.
He tries to reassure her that he hasn’t forgotten that he has to
get the memory, but until he can think of a way to do it, he’ll
follow Malfoy.
She explains that she’s already told him how to get the memory...
he’s got to persuade Slughorn not bespell him or drug him. She
won’t give her support even after his second attempt to attain
it, and the lack of her approval is distressing for Harry.
Hermione reads that the Daily Prophet is stating that Mundungus
has been arrested for impersonating an Inferius. She scans
further to find that Octavius Pepper has vanished and a nine-year-
old boy has been arrested for trying to kill his grandparents.
Going against Hermione’s advice and Dobby’s statement that it’s
impossible, Harry makes his way up to the R of R and attempts to
get it. After at least four failed attempts, Harry arrives to
DADA late and gets points taken from Gryffindor by Snape.
Ron defends Harry to Snape, who in turn makes fun of Ron’s lack
of apparition. Harry goes to says something smart back, but
Hermione stops him for he’ll just wind up in detention again.
After the class, Lavender is there to make Ron feel better about
the jibe.
Stay tuned for the next installment where Ron pulls Harry into a
loo...Strange things are happening at Hogwarts this year!
At one time Lavender’s presence and her defense of his honor
would have pleased Ron, however, now, being totally insecure
about his apparition skills (or lack thereof) and already
irritated with her for being...you know, attentive and, like,
considerate, he yanks Harry into the closest little boys’ room to
avoid her.
They are startled to find Moaning Myrtle in the loo. She’s not
pleased to see them either; she was waiting for someone else. But
then, she’s “learned not to expect too much from boys” because
Harry said he’d visit and hasn’t been around for months.
Curious as to whom Myrtle is so eager to meet, the boys question
her.
... “I mean he’s sensitive, people bully him too, and he feels
lonely and hasn’t got anybody to talk to, and he’s not afraid to
show his feelings and cry!”
Page 462, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Harry wonders if it’s a young boy, who else would go around
crying to ghosts in bathrooms?
And I’d like to take this opportunity to point out that when Cas
and I first read this piece of book-shite, when we came to this
passage we stopped and yelled out some ludicrous, silly, too-
stupid-to-actually-happen ideas of who the crying boy was and I
said “It’s Malfoy!” I mean you have to understand, the idea was
so retarded we just burst out laughing, no need to justify it or
reassure that I was just kidding...it couldn’t possibly be true.
But then guess what happened...
End rant.
Meanwhile, back in the loo, Harry notes that Ron’s taunting
Myrtle has seemingly rejuvenated him. He feels much better about
himself now and can now leave the loo to reenter society. He even
decides he’s going to take the extra apparition lessons in
Hogsmeade.
Harry must have forgotten how rotten he felt when Dumbledore
showed his disappointment in Harry’s lack of dedication to the
cause last time they met because he’s still not listening to
Hermione. While Hermione and Ron go to apparition lessons, Harry
hangs back. Yet instead of doing as Hermione advises and finding
Slug, Harry is determined to break into the R of R.
Frustrated with his lack of progress, Harry kicks at the door to
the R of R. While hopping around holding his foot, the
Invisibility Cloak falls off him. Tonks, who just so happens to
be wandering by, notices him and comes over.
He’s surprised to see her. She says she’s come to see Dumbledore,
but he’s not at school at the moment. She seems distracted and
aloof, not at all her usual self. She asks if Harry’s heard
anything from the Order, she worried because there have been
rumors of people being hurt. He tells her no one writes to him
anymore, not since Sirius.
Immediately, her eyes well up with unshed tears and she turns
abruptly, leaving him to wonder what’s going on with her. Harry
finds Ron and Hermione returned from Hogsmeade and gets the
skinny about what went on in the village.
Ron managed to apparate, though he overshot his goal. Harry asks
how Hermione did and Ron answers for her. He says she was
perfect, as usual, so good he wonders whether Twycross will “pop
the question soon.”
Got to give Ron props...he managed to get me to laugh: “Perfect
deliberation, divination, and desperation or whatever the hell it
is.”
Hermione ignores Ron’s teasing and asks whether Harry has had any
success with the R of R.
Harry then relays the story about Tonks. They are surprised as
well, but Hermione questions why Tonks has abandoned her post
protecting the school just to talk to Dumbledore. Harry asks
whether she thinks Tonks was in love with Sirius.
He tells her about Tonks’ Patronus changing into what he thinks
may be Sirius in animagus form. Hermione admits it may be the
case, but that it still doesn’t explain what she’s doing ignoring
her work.
He seeks out Hermione’s opinion and approval of his theory.
It’s a thought he’s had for a while and never voiced it, he’s
even almost worried about telling her because matters of the
heart are more her domain. His need her approval and support is
illustrated yet again suggesting his natural reliance on her
opinion. And she doesn’t put his idea down or totally dismiss it.
They often use each other’s ideas as a base for their own
contemplations. As here, she still questions what would make
Tonks act wonky enough to leave her post.
Ron intellectually interjects his magnificent opinion that girls
are easily upset.
Rosmerta didn’t laugh at their joke about the hag, the Healer,
and the Mimbulus mimbletonia.”
Page 468, U.S. Hardcover Edition
would have pleased Ron, however, now, being totally insecure
about his apparition skills (or lack thereof) and already
irritated with her for being...you know, attentive and, like,
considerate, he yanks Harry into the closest little boys’ room to
avoid her.
They are startled to find Moaning Myrtle in the loo. She’s not
pleased to see them either; she was waiting for someone else. But
then, she’s “learned not to expect too much from boys” because
Harry said he’d visit and hasn’t been around for months.
Curious as to whom Myrtle is so eager to meet, the boys question
her.
... “I mean he’s sensitive, people bully him too, and he feels
lonely and hasn’t got anybody to talk to, and he’s not afraid to
show his feelings and cry!”
Page 462, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Harry wonders if it’s a young boy, who else would go around
crying to ghosts in bathrooms?
And I’d like to take this opportunity to point out that when Cas
and I first read this piece of book-shite, when we came to this
passage we stopped and yelled out some ludicrous, silly, too-
stupid-to-actually-happen ideas of who the crying boy was and I
said “It’s Malfoy!” I mean you have to understand, the idea was
so retarded we just burst out laughing, no need to justify it or
reassure that I was just kidding...it couldn’t possibly be true.
But then guess what happened...
End rant.
Meanwhile, back in the loo, Harry notes that Ron’s taunting
Myrtle has seemingly rejuvenated him. He feels much better about
himself now and can now leave the loo to reenter society. He even
decides he’s going to take the extra apparition lessons in
Hogsmeade.
Harry must have forgotten how rotten he felt when Dumbledore
showed his disappointment in Harry’s lack of dedication to the
cause last time they met because he’s still not listening to
Hermione. While Hermione and Ron go to apparition lessons, Harry
hangs back. Yet instead of doing as Hermione advises and finding
Slug, Harry is determined to break into the R of R.
Frustrated with his lack of progress, Harry kicks at the door to
the R of R. While hopping around holding his foot, the
Invisibility Cloak falls off him. Tonks, who just so happens to
be wandering by, notices him and comes over.
He’s surprised to see her. She says she’s come to see Dumbledore,
but he’s not at school at the moment. She seems distracted and
aloof, not at all her usual self. She asks if Harry’s heard
anything from the Order, she worried because there have been
rumors of people being hurt. He tells her no one writes to him
anymore, not since Sirius.
Immediately, her eyes well up with unshed tears and she turns
abruptly, leaving him to wonder what’s going on with her. Harry
finds Ron and Hermione returned from Hogsmeade and gets the
skinny about what went on in the village.
Ron managed to apparate, though he overshot his goal. Harry asks
how Hermione did and Ron answers for her. He says she was
perfect, as usual, so good he wonders whether Twycross will “pop
the question soon.”
Got to give Ron props...he managed to get me to laugh: “Perfect
deliberation, divination, and desperation or whatever the hell it
is.”
Hermione ignores Ron’s teasing and asks whether Harry has had any
success with the R of R.
Harry then relays the story about Tonks. They are surprised as
well, but Hermione questions why Tonks has abandoned her post
protecting the school just to talk to Dumbledore. Harry asks
whether she thinks Tonks was in love with Sirius.
He tells her about Tonks’ Patronus changing into what he thinks
may be Sirius in animagus form. Hermione admits it may be the
case, but that it still doesn’t explain what she’s doing ignoring
her work.
He seeks out Hermione’s opinion and approval of his theory.
It’s a thought he’s had for a while and never voiced it, he’s
even almost worried about telling her because matters of the
heart are more her domain. His need her approval and support is
illustrated yet again suggesting his natural reliance on her
opinion. And she doesn’t put his idea down or totally dismiss it.
They often use each other’s ideas as a base for their own
contemplations. As here, she still questions what would make
Tonks act wonky enough to leave her post.
Ron intellectually interjects his magnificent opinion that girls
are easily upset.
- “And yet,” said Hermione, coming out of her reverie, “I doubt
Rosmerta didn’t laugh at their joke about the hag, the Healer,
and the Mimbulus mimbletonia.”
Page 468, U.S. Hardcover Edition
I was going to leave it at that...I swear. I was going to let
Hermione have the last word, because really, who's better than
her?
And I was going to save this for the Character Arcs, but what the
heck, I run this site so I get to do what I want, right?
Right.
So here's the remainder of my notes for Chapter 21...While
Hermione thinks it's odd that Tonks left her guard to speak to
Dumbledore when he's not even around even if she is in love with
Sirius, she doesn't reject Harry's idea. She doesn't slap it out
of the air like she does whenever Ron gets a brainfart. She
doesn't attack the idea or speak to him like he's an idiot...like
she does to Ron.
This is about the gazillionth time we've seen Harry turn to
Hermione for guidance. But it's more than just advice he seeks
from her. He needs her brain power, yes, that we all know...that
much Rowling has stated. Yet it is not the only thing he needs
from her.
He needs her approval, her support. He needs her on his side.
When he wins his trial at the Ministry, he immediately thinks of
her and dumps all his galleons into the fountain of the House Elf.
He's attempted to convince her of his theories about Malfoy how
many times now... He's insecure about his ideas no matter how
adamant he may seem, because she won't say “yes, Harry, you're
right.” And because he can't convince her, maybe - just maybe -
he isn't 100% right.
His desire, his inherent need for her approval would directly
imply a natural acquiescence, an overwhelming respect for her
opinion and an intrinsic craving for her to respect him in the
same way.
Ginny is not mentioned at all and she hasn’t found some way to
assert herself into Harry’s line of sight or literally come by
and put a hand on his shoulder to draw his attention to her.
In fact, she is not mentioned, thought of or referenced in anyway
by any of them the whole chapter. Odd for a rampant chest
monster, no?
When she’s not around, when she’s not forcibly pulling attention,
Harry naturally gravitates to Hermione. He constantly wonders
what Hermione would say or do in a given situation or can even
hear her responses in his mind, her voice in his head. He thinks
of her when she’s not around.
Aside from the odd fantasy here or there, Harry only considers
Ginny when she’s there, present and right in front of him waving
and shouting “Over here, Harry! I’m all attractive now, don’t you
want to go out with me? Everyone else does!”
It doesn’t have to be that Hermione and Harry are in love, but
it’s just very strange behaviour that Harry, who is supposedly in
love with Ginny, never thinks of her. Instead thinks more about
his best friend, his “sister.”
I won’t lie. Clearly, I think Harry and Hermione are better
suited. I think they make better fighting partners and if I had
to divide them into teams of two, it would definitely be those
two. Their strengths and weaknesses compliment each other so that
they work symbiotically. I believe that natural trust and
friendship and willingness to die for each other would translate
over to a romantic level very easily.
However, the purpose of stating Harry’s gravitation to Hermione,
his inarguable trust in and respect for her is not to insist that
they are made for each other. Rather, it is to illustrate the
gapping plot holes and inconsistencies now forever locked into
this great series.
Everything is not how it should be; everything is most certainly
not happily ever after. Most of what happened in the last two
books is nonsensical. That is the point we’re trying to show.
This may not prove it, but it helps add a little more meat to the
argument.
End Character Arc teaser.
Hermione have the last word, because really, who's better than
her?
And I was going to save this for the Character Arcs, but what the
heck, I run this site so I get to do what I want, right?
Right.
So here's the remainder of my notes for Chapter 21...While
Hermione thinks it's odd that Tonks left her guard to speak to
Dumbledore when he's not even around even if she is in love with
Sirius, she doesn't reject Harry's idea. She doesn't slap it out
of the air like she does whenever Ron gets a brainfart. She
doesn't attack the idea or speak to him like he's an idiot...like
she does to Ron.
This is about the gazillionth time we've seen Harry turn to
Hermione for guidance. But it's more than just advice he seeks
from her. He needs her brain power, yes, that we all know...that
much Rowling has stated. Yet it is not the only thing he needs
from her.
He needs her approval, her support. He needs her on his side.
When he wins his trial at the Ministry, he immediately thinks of
her and dumps all his galleons into the fountain of the House Elf.
He's attempted to convince her of his theories about Malfoy how
many times now... He's insecure about his ideas no matter how
adamant he may seem, because she won't say “yes, Harry, you're
right.” And because he can't convince her, maybe - just maybe -
he isn't 100% right.
His desire, his inherent need for her approval would directly
imply a natural acquiescence, an overwhelming respect for her
opinion and an intrinsic craving for her to respect him in the
same way.
Ginny is not mentioned at all and she hasn’t found some way to
assert herself into Harry’s line of sight or literally come by
and put a hand on his shoulder to draw his attention to her.
In fact, she is not mentioned, thought of or referenced in anyway
by any of them the whole chapter. Odd for a rampant chest
monster, no?
When she’s not around, when she’s not forcibly pulling attention,
Harry naturally gravitates to Hermione. He constantly wonders
what Hermione would say or do in a given situation or can even
hear her responses in his mind, her voice in his head. He thinks
of her when she’s not around.
Aside from the odd fantasy here or there, Harry only considers
Ginny when she’s there, present and right in front of him waving
and shouting “Over here, Harry! I’m all attractive now, don’t you
want to go out with me? Everyone else does!”
It doesn’t have to be that Hermione and Harry are in love, but
it’s just very strange behaviour that Harry, who is supposedly in
love with Ginny, never thinks of her. Instead thinks more about
his best friend, his “sister.”
I won’t lie. Clearly, I think Harry and Hermione are better
suited. I think they make better fighting partners and if I had
to divide them into teams of two, it would definitely be those
two. Their strengths and weaknesses compliment each other so that
they work symbiotically. I believe that natural trust and
friendship and willingness to die for each other would translate
over to a romantic level very easily.
However, the purpose of stating Harry’s gravitation to Hermione,
his inarguable trust in and respect for her is not to insist that
they are made for each other. Rather, it is to illustrate the
gapping plot holes and inconsistencies now forever locked into
this great series.
Everything is not how it should be; everything is most certainly
not happily ever after. Most of what happened in the last two
books is nonsensical. That is the point we’re trying to show.
This may not prove it, but it helps add a little more meat to the
argument.
End Character Arc teaser.
Hermione and Harry are still at odds over his obsession with
Malfoy. They are sitting out in the courtyard enjoying the nice
weather. Hermione and Ron are clutching pamphlets from the
Ministry about Common Apparition Mistakes and How to Avoid Them,
which not much comfort to either of them. The Apparition test is
today!!
Ron tries to hide his hulking form behind Hermione as a random
girl approaches. She wearily notifies him that it’s not Lavender.
The random girl instead aims for Harry to deliver a note. Harry’s
heart sinks because it might be Dumbledore and he hasn’t
recovered the memory from Slug.
Instead of finding Dumbledore’s handwriting, Harry finds a note
from Hagrid covered in tear drops. Hagrid writes to tell them of
Aragog’s death and practically begs them to help him bury his
friend. Distressed, he hands the note to Hermione to read who in
turn reads it and passes it to Ron.
Ron is horrified by being asked to bury a spider who allowed his
family to attack Harry and him in Second Year. Hermione is upset
because Hagrid is asking them for the impossible...breaking the
rules to see him.
Harry points out that they’ve done that before...they break rules
all the time. Hermione insists that it’s different this time as
the security this year is extra tight.
If it were a question of saving him –”
Page 471, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Ron refuses to stand up for Hagrid being that it’s for a spider.
Fine. Fantastic. Ron hates spiders so clearly this would
completely justify him being a jerk to Hagrid. But then nine
times out of ten Ron acts like a jerk to everybody with no
justification, or even cause in most cases, so then I’ve learned
not to expect too much from him.
Hermione’s reaction is horrifying to me. Wasn’t this the girl
that in Third Year nearly killed herself trying to help Hagrid?
Didn’t she used to go crying to him when Ron and Harry were being
mean to her? In Fifth Year, weren’t they all mad as hell and
ready to go charging down when they watched from the Astronomy
Tower as Umbridge and her Ministry cronies attacked Hagrid and
Fang?
“But after all – Aragog’s dead.”
WTF?!?! Like that’s the point!?! It’s not about who’s dead or how
they died, it’s about going to be with your friend because he
needs you...because he’s point blank asked for you..because he
has no one else and considers you family, because he expects you
to be there...because he’s your friend!
I’m disgusted that both Hermione and Ron are making this about
some stupid, creepy spider and ignoring the fact that Hagrid is
in pain and needs his friends.
Harry knows; Harry can see it. Harry’s upset to see that there
were tear stains on the page blurring out the words. Harry feels
compelled to go to Hagrid. And yet, when Hermione questions him
about it, that he can’t seriously be thinking about it, that it’s
a really stupid thing to get detention for, he backs off. He
complies. Ten seconds ago he’s swearing Malfoy is the devil, but
now, when it counts, he’s easily led, tractable to Hermione’s
will?
He definitely respects her opinion, but when has he ever bowed to
it without a fight? Here he meekly answers her question with a:
“I s’pose Hagrid’ll have to bury Aragog without us.”
This is the exact thing I’m talking about when I rant about this
book. This is the clearest example of it. Here, in this precise
moment, the character loss and total reversal/betrayal of
character delineation is illustrated in its most obvious form.
Since when does Hermione not do the right thing? Since when does
Hermione not try to help her friends? Since when does Harry not
intrinsically know right from wrong? Since when does Harry not
run to Hagrid’s defense and aid?
If you ever wondered where I got my crazy beliefs, or why exactly
I call this the book from hell...here it is! Just re-read this
part – you don’t even have to re-read the whole chapter, just
this one section.
Is this what happens to Hermione when she’s under the influence
of Ron? She acts jealous and catty and callous?
And where’d Harry’s newly developed superbrain go? Since when
won’t he risk a mere detention?
......
Okay, I’ll try to calm down from this and continue, but it might
not be for a while. I’m about thisclose to throwing this book-
shite out the window.
Malfoy. They are sitting out in the courtyard enjoying the nice
weather. Hermione and Ron are clutching pamphlets from the
Ministry about Common Apparition Mistakes and How to Avoid Them,
which not much comfort to either of them. The Apparition test is
today!!
Ron tries to hide his hulking form behind Hermione as a random
girl approaches. She wearily notifies him that it’s not Lavender.
The random girl instead aims for Harry to deliver a note. Harry’s
heart sinks because it might be Dumbledore and he hasn’t
recovered the memory from Slug.
Instead of finding Dumbledore’s handwriting, Harry finds a note
from Hagrid covered in tear drops. Hagrid writes to tell them of
Aragog’s death and practically begs them to help him bury his
friend. Distressed, he hands the note to Hermione to read who in
turn reads it and passes it to Ron.
Ron is horrified by being asked to bury a spider who allowed his
family to attack Harry and him in Second Year. Hermione is upset
because Hagrid is asking them for the impossible...breaking the
rules to see him.
Harry points out that they’ve done that before...they break rules
all the time. Hermione insists that it’s different this time as
the security this year is extra tight.
- “Yes, but for something like this?” said Hermione. “We’ve
If it were a question of saving him –”
Page 471, U.S. Hardcover Edition
Ron refuses to stand up for Hagrid being that it’s for a spider.
Fine. Fantastic. Ron hates spiders so clearly this would
completely justify him being a jerk to Hagrid. But then nine
times out of ten Ron acts like a jerk to everybody with no
justification, or even cause in most cases, so then I’ve learned
not to expect too much from him.
Hermione’s reaction is horrifying to me. Wasn’t this the girl
that in Third Year nearly killed herself trying to help Hagrid?
Didn’t she used to go crying to him when Ron and Harry were being
mean to her? In Fifth Year, weren’t they all mad as hell and
ready to go charging down when they watched from the Astronomy
Tower as Umbridge and her Ministry cronies attacked Hagrid and
Fang?
“But after all – Aragog’s dead.”
WTF?!?! Like that’s the point!?! It’s not about who’s dead or how
they died, it’s about going to be with your friend because he
needs you...because he’s point blank asked for you..because he
has no one else and considers you family, because he expects you
to be there...because he’s your friend!
I’m disgusted that both Hermione and Ron are making this about
some stupid, creepy spider and ignoring the fact that Hagrid is
in pain and needs his friends.
Harry knows; Harry can see it. Harry’s upset to see that there
were tear stains on the page blurring out the words. Harry feels
compelled to go to Hagrid. And yet, when Hermione questions him
about it, that he can’t seriously be thinking about it, that it’s
a really stupid thing to get detention for, he backs off. He
complies. Ten seconds ago he’s swearing Malfoy is the devil, but
now, when it counts, he’s easily led, tractable to Hermione’s
will?
He definitely respects her opinion, but when has he ever bowed to
it without a fight? Here he meekly answers her question with a:
“I s’pose Hagrid’ll have to bury Aragog without us.”
This is the exact thing I’m talking about when I rant about this
book. This is the clearest example of it. Here, in this precise
moment, the character loss and total reversal/betrayal of
character delineation is illustrated in its most obvious form.
Since when does Hermione not do the right thing? Since when does
Hermione not try to help her friends? Since when does Harry not
intrinsically know right from wrong? Since when does Harry not
run to Hagrid’s defense and aid?
If you ever wondered where I got my crazy beliefs, or why exactly
I call this the book from hell...here it is! Just re-read this
part – you don’t even have to re-read the whole chapter, just
this one section.
Is this what happens to Hermione when she’s under the influence
of Ron? She acts jealous and catty and callous?
And where’d Harry’s newly developed superbrain go? Since when
won’t he risk a mere detention?
......
Okay, I’ll try to calm down from this and continue, but it might
not be for a while. I’m about thisclose to throwing this book-
shite out the window.
| ******* |
| Chapter 22: After the Burial |
After this ridiculous conversation about betraying their
friendship to Hagrid, Hermione suggests Harry use the nearly
empty Potions class to soften Sluggy up. Most of the class will
be missing due to the Apparition test, and Harry bitterly asks
her if she thinks he’ll get lucky with this, his 57th go at Slug.
Ron suddenly has an epiphany (normally, I would count this in
with the idiotic and mysterious character personality swap taking
place here, but for some reason I’m feeling generous toward ickle
Ronnie at the moment so I’ll just say that even a broken watch is
right two times a day). He suddenly remembers that Harry’s got
Lucky Potion!
Hermione, sounding utterly floored by Ron’s brain activity,
admits that Ron’s got a point and ponders aloud why she didn’t
think of it. (I agree, why didn’t she? Since when is Ron the
smart one?)
Harry reluctantly agrees with this plan, but he was saving it for
something important. Hermione demands to know what is more
important than this memory and Harry wanders off into a daydream.
He was hoping to use for something, you know, really important,
like Ginny and Dean breaking up and Ron then being okay with
Harry taking up with her.
Hermione calls him out of his daydream. Harry makes the deal that
if Sluggy won’t talk this afternoon, then he’ll be slipping some
potion into the mix.
Hermione makes a graceful pirouette reciting the 3Ds, psyching
herself up for the big test. Ron panics and begs her to stop
making him even more nervous. A few girls wander into the
courtyard and Ron dives behind Hermione again, she exasperatedly
exclaims that they are not Lavender either.
They are the Montgomery sisters: their brother just got attacked
by a werewolf and died. The rumor is that the werewolf was Fenrir
Greyback.
Ron’s just admitted to losing track of all the horrible things
happening to people’s relatives; Harry angrily declares that
Greyback is a maniac; Hermione mentions again how important it is
that Harry get that memory. (And suddenly normality is returned.)
If Ron’s losing track of all the horrible things taking place,
that must mean they get awful news all the time. We’ve already
seen that it’s routine to check the morning Prophet for any names
they might recognize. This war is serious and currently taking
place...it’s not on the backburner. It’s not on the horizon.
These aren’t mere plans being laid out for the future. It’s on
and it’s right now, right in front of them. The flames of it
licking at their sides as they run aimlessly back and forth on
the high wire dangling mere feet above the pits of hell.
So why isn’t there more focus on what can be done to counteract
that? Why isn’t the war effort shown at all? Why are we reduced
to watching the adolescent horror-show of dating and hormones?
I’ve heard several times that people regard this as Rowling best
work yet. That this book is brilliantly laid out and deep. ....
WTF? Did we read the same book? Have you read all the summentary
up until this point? Was this what happened in your copy of the
book?
If this is what actually happened and I don’t have some defunct
copy, can someone please explain to me what these “book 6 likers”
are talking about?!
There are sections that make sense. The one chapter on Horcruxes
is amazing. But it’s chapter 23! TWENTY-THREE!!! It takes place
about 500 pages into a 650 page book! Does that make sense to
anyone?! This is the most important key in the universe and the
first time we get any explanation as to what the hell is going
on, what the point of this whole book is,
it’s 500 pages into the damned devil spawn of hell piece of book-
site!?
Yes, the key revelations have to be withheld. I do understand
dramatic structure. But are you aware, random person who may be
disagreeing with me while reading this, that there is no other
point to this entire book besides Horcruxes? That is the sole
purpose of this book. What else do we learn?
That Snape may or may not be evil?
That security around the school is tighter than usual and that
bad things are happening to innocent people?
We learn about Lucky Juice and Love Potion, which “never show up
again” in the series. We learn how to Apparate, though it’s
wasted on all us poor Muggle slobs who can’t do magic. Is that
enough for an entirely separate novel?
No.
Could we not have learned those things in, say, Fifth Year?
Before Harry and the gang take off in Seventh Year? During those
private lessons with Lupin in Third Year?
No, clearly there had to be an entire novel devoted to irrelevant
potions and apparition which we’ve seen dozens of times before
and heard all about how hard it is and all that.
It seems almost like there was really only enough story for 6
books, but since she established that there would be 7 total, we
got stuck with filler storylines and “look over here at my left
hand so I can slap you in the face with my right hand” maneuvers.
Distraction and nonsense. Hormones and underhanded evil plotters
who can’t even carry out their own plots. Very nice, yes indeed.
Good story.
No. The entire point, the only reason for the existence of book
6, is to explain Horcruxes. Could we not have learned that in the
beginning of Seventh Year? How much more action-packed would that
have made the last book?! Then, maybe, we wouldn’t have to sit
and watch three teenagers get increasingly pissy with each other
while stuck in the middle of the wild British backwoods.
Maybe then we’d get to see them chase after Horcruxes. Maybe even
aided by Dumbledore before his untimely demise, perhaps still at
the hand of Severus, but making his loss that much more
horrifying in that it was so close to the end and now with
Voldemort knowing of the plot against his Horcruxes and
exponentially more enraged and dangerous...
Anyway, my point is that if this is the entire purpose of the
book its then torture having to wade through chapter upon chapter
of garbage and meaningless drivel. Put us out of our misery and
cut to the point. Give us the chapter on Horcruxes...hell, give
us all the Voldemort memories and make it a small novella
interlude between the acts.
I’m sorry I can’t seem to get through this chapter without
becoming enraged. I swear I am trying to calm down about it, and
I was for like a minute and then I started thinking...you know
how I get when I think...all thoughtful and stuff.
And that’s just crazy, why should a fan think about the story
they’re reading, why shouldn’t they just swallow whole what’s
being shoved down their throats and say “thank you, ma’am, may I
have some more”?
Clearly, a true fan would be more like a zombie and just follow
along until eventually they get led off a cliff. Obviously, I’m
the devil and a bad fan for having a brain and using it.
Undoubtedly, I’m satan for having questioned things that don’t
make sense and not just accepting my role as blind believer.
...grr...
Okay, it’s time for a chill out. Hopefully, you can laugh this
off while I go run around the block a few times to cool down.
friendship to Hagrid, Hermione suggests Harry use the nearly
empty Potions class to soften Sluggy up. Most of the class will
be missing due to the Apparition test, and Harry bitterly asks
her if she thinks he’ll get lucky with this, his 57th go at Slug.
Ron suddenly has an epiphany (normally, I would count this in
with the idiotic and mysterious character personality swap taking
place here, but for some reason I’m feeling generous toward ickle
Ronnie at the moment so I’ll just say that even a broken watch is
right two times a day). He suddenly remembers that Harry’s got
Lucky Potion!
Hermione, sounding utterly floored by Ron’s brain activity,
admits that Ron’s got a point and ponders aloud why she didn’t
think of it. (I agree, why didn’t she? Since when is Ron the
smart one?)
Harry reluctantly agrees with this plan, but he was saving it for
something important. Hermione demands to know what is more
important than this memory and Harry wanders off into a daydream.
He was hoping to use for something, you know, really important,
like Ginny and Dean breaking up and Ron then being okay with
Harry taking up with her.
Hermione calls him out of his daydream. Harry makes the deal that
if Sluggy won’t talk this afternoon, then he’ll be slipping some
potion into the mix.
Hermione makes a graceful pirouette reciting the 3Ds, psyching
herself up for the big test. Ron panics and begs her to stop
making him even more nervous. A few girls wander into the
courtyard and Ron dives behind Hermione again, she exasperatedly
exclaims that they are not Lavender either.
They are the Montgomery sisters: their brother just got attacked
by a werewolf and died. The rumor is that the werewolf was Fenrir
Greyback.
Ron’s just admitted to losing track of all the horrible things
happening to people’s relatives; Harry angrily declares that
Greyback is a maniac; Hermione mentions again how important it is
that Harry get that memory. (And suddenly normality is returned.)
If Ron’s losing track of all the horrible things taking place,
that must mean they get awful news all the time. We’ve already
seen that it’s routine to check the morning Prophet for any names
they might recognize. This war is serious and currently taking
place...it’s not on the backburner. It’s not on the horizon.
These aren’t mere plans being laid out for the future. It’s on
and it’s right now, right in front of them. The flames of it
licking at their sides as they run aimlessly back and forth on
the high wire dangling mere feet above the pits of hell.
So why isn’t there more focus on what can be done to counteract
that? Why isn’t the war effort shown at all? Why are we reduced
to watching the adolescent horror-show of dating and hormones?
I’ve heard several times that people regard this as Rowling best
work yet. That this book is brilliantly laid out and deep. ....
WTF? Did we read the same book? Have you read all the summentary
up until this point? Was this what happened in your copy of the
book?
If this is what actually happened and I don’t have some defunct
copy, can someone please explain to me what these “book 6 likers”
are talking about?!
There are sections that make sense. The one chapter on Horcruxes
is amazing. But it’s chapter 23! TWENTY-THREE!!! It takes place
about 500 pages into a 650 page book! Does that make sense to
anyone?! This is the most important key in the universe and the
first time we get any explanation as to what the hell is going
on, what the point of this whole book is,
it’s 500 pages into the damned devil spawn of hell piece of book-
site!?
Yes, the key revelations have to be withheld. I do understand
dramatic structure. But are you aware, random person who may be
disagreeing with me while reading this, that there is no other
point to this entire book besides Horcruxes? That is the sole
purpose of this book. What else do we learn?
That Snape may or may not be evil?
- Kind of already knew that, thanks.
That security around the school is tighter than usual and that
bad things are happening to innocent people?
- If you’ve ever studied the history of any country, you’d be
able to figure out that war...yeah, it isn’t so nice.
We learn about Lucky Juice and Love Potion, which “never show up
again” in the series. We learn how to Apparate, though it’s
wasted on all us poor Muggle slobs who can’t do magic. Is that
enough for an entirely separate novel?
No.
Could we not have learned those things in, say, Fifth Year?
Before Harry and the gang take off in Seventh Year? During those
private lessons with Lupin in Third Year?
No, clearly there had to be an entire novel devoted to irrelevant
potions and apparition which we’ve seen dozens of times before
and heard all about how hard it is and all that.
It seems almost like there was really only enough story for 6
books, but since she established that there would be 7 total, we
got stuck with filler storylines and “look over here at my left
hand so I can slap you in the face with my right hand” maneuvers.
Distraction and nonsense. Hormones and underhanded evil plotters
who can’t even carry out their own plots. Very nice, yes indeed.
Good story.
No. The entire point, the only reason for the existence of book
6, is to explain Horcruxes. Could we not have learned that in the
beginning of Seventh Year? How much more action-packed would that
have made the last book?! Then, maybe, we wouldn’t have to sit
and watch three teenagers get increasingly pissy with each other
while stuck in the middle of the wild British backwoods.
Maybe then we’d get to see them chase after Horcruxes. Maybe even
aided by Dumbledore before his untimely demise, perhaps still at
the hand of Severus, but making his loss that much more
horrifying in that it was so close to the end and now with
Voldemort knowing of the plot against his Horcruxes and
exponentially more enraged and dangerous...
Anyway, my point is that if this is the entire purpose of the
book its then torture having to wade through chapter upon chapter
of garbage and meaningless drivel. Put us out of our misery and
cut to the point. Give us the chapter on Horcruxes...hell, give
us all the Voldemort memories and make it a small novella
interlude between the acts.
I’m sorry I can’t seem to get through this chapter without
becoming enraged. I swear I am trying to calm down about it, and
I was for like a minute and then I started thinking...you know
how I get when I think...all thoughtful and stuff.
And that’s just crazy, why should a fan think about the story
they’re reading, why shouldn’t they just swallow whole what’s
being shoved down their throats and say “thank you, ma’am, may I
have some more”?
Clearly, a true fan would be more like a zombie and just follow
along until eventually they get led off a cliff. Obviously, I’m
the devil and a bad fan for having a brain and using it.
Undoubtedly, I’m satan for having questioned things that don’t
make sense and not just accepting my role as blind believer.
...grr...
Okay, it’s time for a chill out. Hopefully, you can laugh this
off while I go run around the block a few times to cool down.
Right, let's try this again shall we...
| ******* |
| Chapter 21: The Unknowable Room |
| Copyright © 2007 | www.booksandwands.com | All Rights Reserved No copyright infringement intended of any and all source material. Harry Potter belongs to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury, Scholastic and Warner Brothers Entertainment. |
| The Ultimate Harry Potter Analysis Source |
| Choosing what is Right over what is Easy |
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